The people described in this blog are composites of many different clients with whom I have worked. Names and identifying characteristics are fictitious, and any resemblance to a single person is coincidental.

A basic truth

What you feel is a basic truth.  It is what it is.  Right here and now in your body the sensations and flow of your inner experience is simply a fact.  You did not make it so, it just is.  Your feelings are your living response to incoming stimuli…  they arise out of a source deep within you, influenced by your history and your biology.

There may be complexity to your feeling, or it may be very simple.  It may be fresh and new and only about what is in front of you right in this moment.  Or it may be loaded with old unfinished business.  It may be obvious where it comes from or it may be a mystery to you.  It may be something you feel just fine about, or it may be something you really wish you weren’t feeling.

Whatever the case, what you feel is a basic truth.  And the only way to uncover the gift for you in that truth is to approach the feeling itself and be with it.  The feelings we have are communications from a deep part of us, letting us know who we are and what matters to us, orienting us to what is important, informing us, energizing us to take action, and integrating our physical, emotional and mental experience.

Your feelings matter.

But they may not matter to you…

A basic truth

You do not have a choice about having feelings… the flow is the flow is the flow.  Your feelings are just going on inside you.  But you do have a choice as to what you will do with what is going on inside of you.  You can resolve to tune in and listen and care about and take care of what you feel, or you can ignore and neglect yourself.  You can tune out.  You can avoid your inner world and stay out of touch with yourself.  You can do that by being too busy or too tired or too strong or too scared to feel… but if you make that choice you do not stop the feeling, you only block your access to it.

Our feelings just are what they are.  They are not good or bad.  They have the potential to enrich our understanding and energize our actions and grow our potential, if we will approach them.

Here is the key: my relationship to my feelings is where my health is (or is not).  My capacity to stay with the vulnerability of feeling and soothe my nervous system as I face the waves of feeling are the evidence of my health.  And these are the accelerators of my growth.

It has been said that the source of all suffering lies in not accepting what is.  The basic truth of your feelings just is.  I invite you to come home and be with you right there in what you feel.  Will you?  You are so worth it.

Photo Credit: Dynamic DB

Dr. Sandra Parker, copyright 2009 - Dr. Sandra Parker. The stories & quotes in this blog are fictional. Creative commons attribution, non-commercial sharing only.
(translation: feel free to quote me in context or use this entry but please always credit me for my work, thanks.)

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